Tag: Relationships

You Don’t Have to Be on the Same Page

Often, we think that to get along, especially in relationships, we have to be on the same page. Well, I disagree.

We are all different. We are each unique expressions of the image of God with different hopes, dreams, and ideas. We each have our own experiences and differentiating nuances in world views. Yes, even when we believe the same thing.

Imagining romantic relationships here – what if her level of spirituality is different from yours? What do you do then? Is it a good match or not? Obviously, one of you has much to learn, yes?

So, being on the same page is not really plausible. What do you do then?

When you are in a relationship or intend to begin a deep one –

You don’t have to be on the same page.

You just have to be reading from the same book.

Here’s why – Continue reading “You Don’t Have to Be on the Same Page”

Fill the Void with Life

Today is my twin brother’s birthday.

Today is Halle Patrick’s birthday. And I am all giggles and stuff. I can’t stop smiling.

He wasn’t my conventional twin per say. Blood is thicker than water. But, our bond was beyond that. Its as if when God sent a soul to inhabit a body in a mother’s womb, before the soul reached the earth, God said –

“This is a beautiful and powerful soul. Let’s make a separate the essence and send the other half to another woman who is crying for a baby.”

And so, we went. Then, the Almighty thought again andtold the angel carrying us –

Make sure that they have everything they need. Orchestrate their paths to meet so that they can become twins again. Put in their infant hearts a covenant sign so that when they meet again, they will know they were long lost twins. And they will become one-alike and one-too-much.”

And so it was that we came to be. Continue reading “Fill the Void with Life”

Make the Most of Your “Nuclear Reactions”

Hello folks,

This is going to be an excellent year

I have often said, success is not about the destination, and its not about the journey either. Its about THE PEOPLE on the way to your destination. Our dreams and visions are for the people. Through our interactions with them we get inspired to think, dream, and imagine.

To succeed, we find out what they want and serve them. Regardless of how talented and gifted we are, we still need to deal with people. And even after all the adventure is done, we are left with – people – the good, the bad, and the ugly. And we still need to deal with them.

But, I often think we forget just how powerful our interaction with people are.

So, here’s a perspective* from The Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson of righteous memory –

You think that human interactions are like chemical reactions. When two elements interact, they result in the creation of a third compound. But people aren’t chemicals.

~ When people interact its like  A NUCLEAR REACTION ~

A nuclear reaction has a center, from which further reactions spread in all directions. As the outer rings of that sphere gets larger, the number of reactions grow exponentially.

Likewise, when you touch the heart of one person very deeply – even just for a moment – he in turn will touch many other people, triggering a nuclear explosion of positive influence.”

In short, Continue reading “Make the Most of Your “Nuclear Reactions””

Answer People NOT Questions

Hello folks,

This is going to be an excellent year.

When I was studying Torah (bible) with a Rabbi and while I was learning from Chabad in the Midwest, I came across a saying. And this quote has become one of my favorite and has been shaping my approach to communication since. It is –

A Rabbi answers questions but a Rebbe answers people.

A Rebbe is a Rabbi, but one who has an intimate connection to his God, his people, his people’s experiences, his community, his own experience, and a wealth of wisdom and insight from the God who made and knows the people.

For instance this is my version of a story of my favorite Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson, taken from the book Seeds of Wisdom – 2, written by Mendel Kalmenson:

A young Rabbi who had a fledgling business came to see the Rebbe because he was feeling overwhelmed. He was hoping to find out where to cut back and where to focus. Instead, the Rebbe said to him,

Not only should you NOT cut back your activities, but you should increase your outreach efforts, your rabbinic work, and also your business.”

Now, tell me this. Did that answer the question? Did this answer even sound like it answered the person? Continue reading “Answer People NOT Questions”

The Search for Love is REAL

Hello fam,

I’ve been up and running, from North to South in Califonia and just returned to the villa. Personally, I prefer to sit down, reflect, and write. So, its been particularly difficult to set the mood and press some fresh spiritual and inspiration juice for you.

Nevertheless…

What’s up people?

THIS IS GOING TO BE AN EXCELLENT YEAR

Last weekend, I was in Orange County attending a Singles Life Workshop. And people, let me tell you – AMAZING! I was thinking I would walk into this event and meet 20-somethings and maybe, 30-somethings and maybe find a “pretty mama” but noooo….

I saw a few 20-somethings and 30’s to 60-somethings all over the place. I was like – Lord, have mercy…

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Seriously! I was like…even the 40’s to 70’s are looking for love?

I thought folks in their 40’s, 50’s, 60’s…would have it down by now. I thought they would have it all together. But nooo…both the men and women came with their own issues.

And boy, some of those ladies had that perfect 8, size 10…body…, tights, boots, heels and that Beyonce Knowles walk. And…I mean… Continue reading “The Search for Love is REAL”

The Frustration of NOT Being Heard

Hola…wonderful people!

This is going to be an excellent year

So, I just got back from a trip to San Jose and Redding where I reconnected with some friends, met people from several countries, and Cooked up a Storm Saturday night.

~ it was something.

I kept meeting and connecting with folks from Switzerland who kept inviting me to Switzerland. It was like God was saying – hey, I got a bag packing adventure for you in the Swiss Alps if you are interested.

In due time Jesus…in…due…time!

But most of all….I MISSED YOU GUYS….! It was just for a week, but it felt like a thousand…years…

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Hiff hiff…

I just got back. I drove for 10 hours with some two cool and weird ladies who jammed to my Old Skool collection, yo. Wooo…freaked me out.

I’m okay…don’t panic.

A…n…y…w…a…y

On the trip last week with friends, one of my friends, Maria, took a risk. A BIG ONE. She shared the pains, difficulties, struggles, and hardships she was facing in trying to navigate her late twenties without close friends and an understanding community.

I could understand that. Its not easy finding friends in your late 20’s. Its difficult to date if you have standards. Its even more difficult when most of your friends are in different states. And painful when you are in a community but find it hard to become a part of that community.

You know, things some of you can relate to.

Well, Maria’s story was met with a current of brutal honesty, facts, and counsel which were ALL lacking in one thing – EMPATHY (Love and Understanding). And boy did it erupt into a minor argument of – spirituality.

And where was I? Continue reading “The Frustration of NOT Being Heard”

Dating Etiquette for the Social Media OBSESSED — BeautyBeyondBones

Part of fulfilling your destiny is finding someone amazing to spend the rest of your life with and build the vision the Good Lord ignites in you.

If you are a guy and looking, here are some pointers from one of my favorite bloggers.

I promise, you’ll love it.

Caralyn, writer behind Beauty Beyond Bones has this to say

Romance is a dying art. Truly. In the age of smart phones, Snapchat and communicating through emojis, dating is, frankly, limping along like a squirrel run over by a semi. Too much? Perhaps. But in this era of 140 character expression, chivalry has taken a hit. Which poses the question, what are we to expect…

via Dating Etiquette for the Social Media OBSESSED — BeautyBeyondBones

THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR

Thanksgiving is the reason for the season.

With that in mind, I want to thank The Two Most Important women in my life – Grandma Dinah and Mom. These women sacrificed almost everything to raise me. They would die for me. Thank you so much.

Here’s is an intimate look at my origin through Grandma’s eyes.

She is over 100 and still going.

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Zongkra Bigmami (Dialect for Thank you Grandma)

First, I mention them to show you where I came from. Secondly, it is to add life to a  blessing/prophecy they gave me when I was young, a word which is unfolding. And lastly, their blessing connects me to the person this post is about.

What grandma and mom prayed and prophesied was –

“Son, you will have many mothers in your life.”

Its a parable which means – Continue reading “THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR”

Back to Basics

Howdy folks,

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Still reflecting on stuff! Its been a lazy week for me – because I am still in reflecting mode. But, its been helpful for me to STOP and go back to basics. While at it, I have been reading things I wrote years ago. Perhaps this has been the reason for this season.

And I want to share something which – you already know (I hope).

C. S Lewis wrote –

You don’t have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.”

In your soul is the light that gives you life. It may be dim, but that’s the journey most of us are taking. Our souls embody the dreams and visions of grandeur, the essence of our ideas, the motives of our success, and questions of worth and meaning.

When we lose our will to live, we die. When we give up or quit, we become the living dead. When we lose our passion for life and our enthusiasm for a bright future, our faces become dim and we begin to crash into despair and depression. Continue reading “Back to Basics”

FOR GOD’S SAKE: HOW MANY KEYS TO SUCCESS ARE THEY? (Indulge me for a sec)

Let me be real for a minute.

Hands up if you have ever watched a video or read an an article that said something like:

  • The THREE things you need to succeed
  • FIVE keys to success
  • This ONE thing will make you rich in a year
  • SEVEN Life Changing Keys to Success
  • SIX Traits the Most Successful People Have in Common

….and so on.

Ok. Many hands…

Now! Hands up if you are sick and tired of hearing about “this” key to success, “that” key to success, and the many other different keys to success that never seem to end?

Hmm hmm…

These days, listening to “The Experts” these days end up confusing and frustrating some of us. They share keys like be consistent, determination, commitment, communicate well, excellence is required, vision is necessary…or need I go on?

While these are informational, across the board, they are highly personal to the experts. Folks need different keys for different areas of their life and business; for different industries, at different times. That’s why “keys to success” never seem to end.

After listening to several or trying to put them to work, you end up becoming frustrated. I think its because the many “keys to success” out there miss a pivotal focus.

And, this focus is the ONE & ONLY key to success there is, if one should exist Continue reading “FOR GOD’S SAKE: HOW MANY KEYS TO SUCCESS ARE THEY? (Indulge me for a sec)”