Tag: mother

Thank You Mrs. Mom

I am currently working on my Master’s defense. But, I just had to squeeze out time to brag about the person who has made it physically, financially, mentally, and emotionally possible for me to be able to do it.

I’m talking about an African Queen, Mrs. Mom.

She is one tough cookie. She is sharp too! In fact, she is so sharp you could get cut standing right next to her.

If I told you about her, you’d feel like you just got served a slice of heaven. She is dubbed the Iron Lady, has one “hell” of a right jab, and knows how to groove to the beat people. If Michael Jackson was alive, she’d beat him hands down on his moonwalk.

Her presence is a triple threat.

But she didn’t start off like that. Mom grew up poor. I mean…really poor. She used to carry me on her back like African women do, frying and selling “Gateaux” on the side of the road. See, I grew up watching this.

I heard and felt her pain, tears, sorrows, betrayals…you name it. Figuratively speaking, she’s been left at the altar several times. But she did what she could to survive and with the help of God, she pulled through.

Both her and grandma would send me out to the streets and markets to sell peanuts and other stuff. That’s how I made my lunch and transport money.  Mom eventually got into typewriting school and got a job working as a typewriter. She went on to work for the Department of Finance. Being a woman didn’t help. But, she took her talents into business while working at the department.

That’s how she eventually emerged successful, beating men at the business, rewriting the rules, and inspiring a community of young and old women. That’s where the name – The Iron Lady – comes from. If kids were stubborn, their parents would say, “We are taking you to Ma Ceci’s” house.” That alone made literally “ALL” the kids and even parents in our community readjust.

No kidding.

She now takes care of orphans and widows and mentors young women and single mothers.What’s cute though is that kids still loved to come visit her and talk about life. My goodness, how does she do it though?

How does she make both – love and terror – seem so casual and fun?

She is a trip! Kids with love and laugh and play with mom. But, when a kid knew they’d done wrong, they ran away before mom got back. Mrs. Mom is a real firestorm, but you’d never know it because she seems so sweet and cuddly.

Listen! Ms. Mom is so loving and terrorizing that a stubborn cousin who was forced to live with her because of her behavior studied hard and passed an exam that took two years to prepare for, in a year.

Do you get the picture yet?

And…Lawd….we had our moments.

Oh yea – an uppercut worthy moment. Like a Mike Tyson type of moment. Mom and I got into it after I graduated high school. Let’s just say emotions were high and I wasn’t exactly a peacemaker then. Mom got so furious, she wrapped that cloth around her waist and well…my face was almost history.

Awkward…

But, she is wise too. She often tells us –

  • God has a broken clock. Stop trying to hurry. His ways are not your ways
  • A closed mouth is a closed destiny
  • Always think beyond yourself
  • Speak forward and learn to enjoy life even in the midst of a mess
  • Don’t be afraid. My life is a testament of what God can do. Keep looking up and forward
  • In life, only 5% of people fulfill their calling. How come only 5%? Because they chose to pay the price. Stick it out and it will be better for you too
  • Ahhh…don’t worry about what people say. Let them talk. They talked about me too. Where are they now? Be strong and courageous
  • When you are in a place where you are not in control, be humble and respectful. Take whatever “shit” is given to you. You have your own time and your “own” is on the way.

There is more to tell. But, let me finish preparing this defense. Let me do “us” both one and make her proud. After all, I’m her son.

And to you Almighty God –

Cause the works of my hands to prosper so that I can honor her even as I live to glorify you, in Jesus name. Amen!

 

I love you mom.

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY 


The Best Compliment EVER!

Let me keep it real with you all.

Following Jesus is hard. Saying yes to an adventure he calls you to: saying yes to leadership can be painful. Leadership is hard! It involves a commitment of your emotions, feelings, as well as your mental prowess..

On Monday, I wrote about a crisis I am going through, titled – God is good, my confessions. It was nerve raking. Matter of fact, I am still trembling. I think it is the after effect of being so vulnerable with strangers. After I shared the post, I removed it. Then, I posted it again and then hours later, I removed it. I did this about 5 times.

I was conflicted. Below was and perhaps still is the battle in my soul –

I kept asking myself – Have I shared too much? This is too personal to be sharing with people I don’t know. What the “hell” am I doing?

But then I thought – Ish, you need to preserve yourself and the dignities of those included or connected to these struggles. But, is this a cop out? But it will help someone. But who reads this anyway…? Does it matter…?

Too many thoughts.

I am still shaken because I know its too late. It is said that, “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.” It is true for the internet. What happens on the internet stays on the internet. Difference is not everyone goes to Vegas but everyone is on the internet. And since what I shared stays on the internet stays, even if I delete it., people will find it anyway.

Saying yes to a call from heaven is hard. Leadership is hard.

When you lead or are called to lead, you deal with so many secret pressures and pains. Your hands and body often tremble under stress, fear, and anxiety, while you struggle to keep your composure and think clearly. You don’t have answers or know which way to go. You hold onto faith, but wonder just how much you can take and how much more you can give. There is lonely decision making.

Even though people are all round you, you could be suffering, dying, sweating and silently as well as secretly crying for help and those around you wouldn’t even hear it. Sometimes, you wander what to say. What do you tell people, your people? How do you say it? How do you even explain it when it is so spiritual? Where do you begin? Will “they” understand it?

It is hard to be a leader. Harder still, is fighting the good fight of faith on this ultimate adventure with the Almighty. You’ll do things for its own sake and people will never know. You pray and hope for others even when you yourself are barely holding on and people will never know. You’ll fully engage in celebrating the victories of others and wander – but, what about me? Did I do something wrong? Or is it something right? You pay such a hefty price and then wonder, is this all that I get or is this just life?

While driving this morning, my body was vibrating under all the trials. I was struggling to focus on the words of his promise. But, it was hard. I wondered if I could keep going. I thought to myself – this is hard and when I finish this part of my adventure with the Almighty, I am tempted to say to him – I don’t know if going on with this is still worth the price…! (Its – the pain speaking).

The problem with life is not that it is rationale or irrational. It is that it is almost rationale – J.K Chesterton

Meaning, just when everything seems to fall into place and you seem to be getting a hang of things, and moving along in life, suddenly something happens that throws everything off balance, setting you like a chess piece in a box called – paradox and contradiction.

Suffering brings courage ~ President SirLeaf of Liberia

That said –

It is during our lives lowest and most challenging periods that a patient and listening ear as well as mere words spoken out of love and understanding echo divine messages and become our greatest gifts. Such a message came from my mother.

She is a true African Queen. She is wild at heart and her passion keeps her youthful. She is my biggest supporter, sides with God on everything concerning Ish even when she knows it will be long and painful, and never allows me to say the word depressed. She can feel it when I am losing strength and courage. She just knows. She knows things man.

Anyone have a mom, friend, or a person in their life like that?

Recently, Ms. Mom was talking with a friend. Knowing my trials, her friend expressed concern because she was worried about her own children and couldn’t imagine her children standing under a similar cross if they carried it. Without skipping a beat, Ms. Mom said of me,

I know my boy. I am not worried about him. If any of my other children were in his shoes, I would be worried, crying, and shrieking. But, its him – I’m not worried about him.”

Then, she added this gem –

If you take him and throw him into a sea, he will come out dry. He will come out with a smile. No matter how long it takes. He’ll be fine.”

This gave me much courage. The fact that she believed in me gave me courage. Not many people may understand your life and your life’s call from heaven. You may be lonely on your journey to meet God on page 898 in your book of destiny from page 123. But, the words of that one person – family, friend or stranger – may be all you need to keep going.

Ms. Mom’s words empowered me to keep looking at the Master amidst these divinely engineered storms. Thanks Mom! This is by far the best compliment I have ever received.

Enough with my musing.

What about you? How are you doing and how are you holding up, friends?

What is the best compliment you have ever received in your life?

Why did it matter to you so much?

 

I would love to read your thoughts too. Don’t be shy. I don’t bite.

.

.

One love, One Spirit.


 

 

THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR

Thanksgiving is the reason for the season.

With that in mind, I want to thank The Two Most Important women in my life – Grandma Dinah and Mom. These women sacrificed almost everything to raise me. They would die for me. Thank you so much.

Here’s is an intimate look at my origin through Grandma’s eyes.

She is over 100 and still going.

img_0834-1
Zongkra Bigmami (Dialect for Thank you Grandma)

First, I mention them to show you where I came from. Secondly, it is to add life to a  blessing/prophecy they gave me when I was young, a word which is unfolding. And lastly, their blessing connects me to the person this post is about.

What grandma and mom prayed and prophesied was –

“Son, you will have many mothers in your life.”

Its a parable which means – Continue reading “THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR”

IF NOT FOR HER…

Hello fam –

For a while now, my life has been like a game of pool and my actions like the pool stick. Everything I did felt like I was trying to hit stripped balls into the table’s pockets. Finally, I am at the “8” ball, the last piece for me to play to win the game of pool.

In real life lingo, I can’t figure out what that “8” ball is for me to do so I can complete this season of my life. I am thinking if I can figure it out, I would know what to do to complete this season of my life.

But, it seems God is hinting that it has to do with STOPPING and REFLECTING on my roots. Its as if He is urging me to do this before this circle of my life, which has felt like an evenly matched game between my faith and the forces of evil, ends.

After the shooting in Texas this week, I stopped to think. As I interceded for Sutherland, the Texas Files in my soul were opened. I recalled and smiled at good and bad memories. But, I had to STOP what I had been doing altogether when I received unpleasant news yesterday.

I called to greet my godmother and found she died on September 20th. That’s almost a month and a half ago. I was in shock. And this is happening around the time of my “twin” brother’s one year death anniversary. So, this week, has been interesting.

So, instead of the usual posts about faith, family, process, or developing destiny, I want to remember my godmother, share what she did for me, and some defining lessons from her life as a woman, mother, wife, and missionary.

First, I have to confess.

The first thing that I thought of after hearing the news of her passing was whether I had honestly spent enough time with her

OR

Whether I could have called her more often to just talk and connect. I do my part but I almost felt guilty of not talking to her as often as I wished

Nevertheless. She wouldn’t want me having those feelings.

So, in brief,

This is what Esther Lekunze (Pastor Es as we called her) did for me – Continue reading “IF NOT FOR HER…”